not enough

i say i’m german
and they ask again

no
where are you really from?

my dad is german
my mom is from mexico city
i speak both
but not without an accent

in mexico
they say
you’re not from here
you sound too german

in germany
they say
you don’t look it

i say i’m both
they hear neither

sometimes i wish
my spanish sounded like hers

sometimes i wish
my german wasn’t followed
by questions

in mexico
i’m a tourist
in germany
i’m a question

i belong to both
but i don’t fit in either

i dream in german
sing in spanish
laugh in english

and sometimes
when no one’s asking
i just feel like me

and when i forget that’s enough
i remember what she said
te amo

not an answer
just a voice
that says i’m loved

and because i am
i want to go everywhere
to find the place
where someone will hear
“i’m german”
and say
okay